Issue #14 - The Maturity I Didn’t Expect

The older I get, the more I realize that maturity isn't about having all the answers—it's about learning to depend on God more deeply. I once thought that by the time I turned fifty, I would be wiser and have the answers to life's challenges. Instead, I find myself increasingly aware of my inadequacies and of how much I still have to learn.

This season of life is both beautiful and demanding. I am sandwiched between caring for my aging parents and raising children who are now teenagers and young adults. At the same time, I am navigating my own hormonal changes, which have affected me physically, mentally, and emotionally.

Because of these pressures, I often find myself becoming impatient, slow to truly listen, quick to speak, and easily irritated. There are nights when anxiety keeps me awake, leading to insomnia that only fuels a cycle of exhaustion and impatience.

I have a tendency to voice my opinions or offer correction whenever I see my family members making what I believe are poor decisions. Yet I have realized that my aging parents often feel discouraged rather than supported when I correct them. Simply listening to them and empathizing with them brings comfort and encouragement.

The same is true with my children. When I give them my full attention without immediately offering advice or passing judgment, they feel loved, valued, and understood.

These are the moments when I need to draw near to God the most. I need to fill my heart with His peace, abide in His Word, and allow His love to transform me from the inside out. Only then can I reflect His character to my parents and my children with grace, empathy, and understanding. I have also learned the importance of humbly asking for forgiveness whenever I fail.

God's character is often displayed in simple yet powerful ways: being quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry. This stands in sharp contrast to the culture around us. We live in a world where everyone seems eager to voice opinions, pass judgment, and make accusations. As I reflect on my own heart, I realize that I, too, have been drawn into that pattern. In doing so, I have sometimes hurt the very people I love most.

My prayer is not that life will become easier or more comfortable, but that I will become more like Christ through it. I want my family to experience His love through my words, my patience, and my actions. As I surrender my weaknesses to Him each day, I am reminded that true maturity is not found in having all the answers, but in depending more deeply on Him. I trust that His strength will be enough and that His grace will continue to shape me into the woman, daughter, mother, and follower of Christ He has called me to be.

James reminds us that spiritual maturity is reflected not in always having the right words, but in having the humility to listen first and the self-control to respond with grace:

“My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires.”
— James 1:19–20 (NIV)

-Min-Hee